Monday, 28 November 2011

A Face Only a Palaeoanthropologist Could Love: H. Neanderthalensis

First point of the day.
Although I'm technically practicing without a licence, I'm nonetheless giving Neanderthals a long-overdue face-lift. I'm doing it without anaesthetic for the Very Serious Palaeoanthropologists (VSPs) of the academy who've completely missed the point over the years. From the First Flower People to the Neanderthal Enigma and everything in between. It's they who've been under anaesthetic all this time! I think it fitting now to lift the mask, let some fresh air in, and they can then regain consciousness.
Second point of the day.
I'm very grateful to the readership of SA for hanging in there, and for the implicit support of your mouse/trackpad/trackball finger. Speaking of fingers. I'd have thought that by now, with my middle digit upraised in most of my posts, one or two VSPs would have chimed in with a 
'Tut, tut, Robert. Mustn't say these sorts of things. Be scientific. The people who've come before you knew what they were doing. They were good people, with lots of prestige and a well-paying professorship. Appeal to authority, Robert, and you'll never be unhappy.' 
Hardly likely. All eight of my fingers will keep chip, chip, chipping away at the crumbling mortar, and one bright morning...

[You just keep thinking like that, Rob. We're certain that your dreams will come true, and one day you'll be standing on the Olympus of the anthropology world, glass of wine in one hand and a beautiful Neanderthal in your other, with the whole tribe oogy, oogy, ooing at your feet.]

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